Yes they are amongst us, the bat-shit-crazy. Those persistent fuckwits, just don't know when to pipe down and shut the hell up. They reek of panic and mayhem, spreading their fungus wherever and whenever they go. They systematically invade everywhere that is pro-support Rob and Kristen; vomiting tales of woe and worry 'it's been ...... since Rob and Kristen were
It's pretty easy to get rid of them, they love the attention they get. That's why you will always see them in the shiny, happy corners of the fandom, because their dark and empty souls need the light to survive. They drop their bomb sized rants and then complain, when they get attacked. If they are not attacking Rob, they are attacking Kristen, because let's face it, if they can't have 'super stud Rob' they then invent stories about Kristen.
The Cat...
Their 'needy' obsession of either Rob or Kristen, stops them from functioning in society, as they tend to mumble, moan and drool a lot. Creating 'sexual' fantasies of either, instead of just investing in a large sexual device and get it 'all out of their system!'
Of course, the Robsessed kitty-cats, believe that no one but they, will ever satisfy Rob - or go anywhere near putting a smile on his face as they hug their 'Edward' pillows, still living in twilight land.
The Krisbian kittens, believe that Kristen was fooled and tricked by the womanising Robert, that she is much better off without him and if that means creating 'lesbian' relationships, because a woman would make her so much happier than a man, then so be it.
All as desperate as each other, all filled with hate and loathing and pretty much everything that stinks in a septic tank. Because not much else falls out of their mouths, but shit you wouldn't even fertilise your roses with.
The Penguin...
They waddle amongst us, creating stupid stories from half baked theories, because they forget what it was they were meant to be talking about in the first place.
They forget that Rob has said repeatedly, that he is not into 'one night stands' or 'meaningless relationships' (fuck buddies, hook ups) That Kristen believes in love and goes into it cautiously, but completely. That they have both stressed they are commitment people and when they enter into a relationship they go into it 100%
SO, why oh why do the penguins keep insisting that Rob can't keep it in his trousers long enough and that Kristen is a walking talking, fucking door mat?
These groups are everywhere. If they are not bat-shit-crazy idiots, then they are catty, unloved and unkempt scrawny bitches. Or forgetful, blundering penguins. Reading what either says and then interpreting it as something completely different. They insist that Rob is single, yet he has not ever had that word, fall out of his mouth. He has made passing, boring answers to stop the idiotic media, pressing further. Because they (media) spread the drama, spread the bullshit and sell a story off Rob and Kristen's backs and that is all they are there for. If Kristen or Rob don't answer a question the way they want them to, they editorialise and put their comment in - adding a female or male name, just to spice it up.
If Rob is not dating Kristen, then why is he always seemingly drawn towards her circle; friends, families, animals, clothing shared?
If Rob and Kristen are over...then why are the bats, cats and penguins still worrying over Kristen being in his life?
They obsess about her, need to know where she is, who she is with and if she is in the same area code as him..they invent a night out, a date with Katy Perry, Imogen, Amanda, Anika anyone, anything they don't care. As long as it's not KRISTEN.
The people that worry, obsess and demand attention are those, who know the truth, see the truth, but refuse to believe it.
And that is the tale of this fandom.
Which one of those, are you?
T xx
